THE EPISODE WITH THAT KISS

 

Episode Title:  Plato’s Stepchildren 

Air Date: 11/22/1968

Written by Meyer Dolinsky

Directed by David Alexander

Cast: William Shatner as Captain James T. Kirk    Leonard Nimoy as Commander Spock             DeForest Kelley as Dr. Leonard H. McCoy AKA “Bones”              James Doohan  as Lieutenant Commander Montgomery Scott AKA “Scotty”        Nichelle Nichols as Lieutenant Nyota Uhura          Bill Blackburn as Lieutenant Hadley     Majel Barrett as Nurse Christine Chapel      Jeannie Malone as unnamed Yeoman         Michael Dunn as Alexander         Liam Sullivan as Parmen       Barbara Babcock as Philana           Ted Scott as Eraclitus         Derek Partridge as Dionyd

Ships: USS Enterprise NCC-1701

Planets:  Platonious

My Spoiler filled summary and review: The Enterprise answers the distress call from a previously unknown planet.  Kirk, Spock, and McCoy beam down to the planet they soon learn is called Platonious.   The first Platonian they meet is a Dwarf man named Alexander.  Alexander describes himself and his people as followers of Plato of Ancient Athens.  His role is that of court jester and a player of games.  He lets them know that he is a very good loser.

Philana and Alexander

They are then introduced to a familiar looking woman named Philana.  Philana explains that the patient is the philosopher-king Parmen.  As Dr. McCoy tries to treat Parmen we learn that he had great telekinetic powers. He uses his mind to life McCoy’s tools from him and tries to treat himself.  It is from Philana that Kirk receives a more detailed explanation of their origins.  They were bread using eugenics on the planet Sahndara.  This gives them extremely long lives.  Philana and Parmen are both well over 2,000 years old. The Platonians it turns out had actually been to ancient Greece.  They became so obsessed with Greek culture that when they saw it fade, they took to the stars to form their own colony. 

McCoy treating a dying Parmen, this was a mistake!

Philana tells Captain Kirk that despite their long life and telekinetic powers they have virtually no medical knowledge and no trained practitioner in the medical arts, as their long life and near perfect health make that unnecessary.  She then makes a startling statement, a rather stupid admission given their soon-to-be-reveled intentions, that they are exceptional vulnerable to disease and infection due to their isolation.  She says that even a scratch can led to an infection and kill them. 

  Parmen starts to grow delirious and when he does his power goes crazy, objects start flying around the room, McCoy is pinned back, and even the Enterprise is caught up in the storm. Working diligently McCoy is able to cure Parmen’s condition.  With that done Kirk now wants to leave but when he calls up to the Enterprise Scotty informs him that the ship is stuck in orbit and cannot move. Kirk confronts Parmen about this and Parmen uses his telekinetic powers to force Kirk to smack himself in the face while Parmen shouts “What are you doing? Stop hitting yourself!” (Actually, he didn’t say that but it would have been cool if he did.  Since Kirk was a younger brother, it probably would have brought back some childhood memories.)

Parmen and Philana

Later while discussing their options the three of them are forced to move like puppets, just like Alexander was earlier, into the chambers for an audience with the philosopher-king.  Parmen apologizes for the smack yourself game.  He tries to blame it on his thoughts always becoming reality.  They give each officer a gift and then they invite Dr. McCoy to stay with them forever.  (Like anyone would want to stay with these people forever.)  As punishment for McCoy not agreeing to stay Kirk and Spock are forced to dance and sing Beetlejuice Style.  However, unlike the Deetzs, they are not having a good time.  They even have little Alexander get in on the action by having him ride on Kirk’s back like a donkey.

After their humiliation torture, the Starfleet officers have a conference with Alexander.  First, they conclude that they are not going to tolerate Dr. McCoy staying.  Not only because allowing someone to blackmail a Starfleet officer is wrong but even if they were to give up McCoy it wouldn’t save the ship.   Parmen and his Platonians would not want the Enterprise alerting others of their presence.  As soon as the Platonians had the Doctor they would just destroy them.  Second, they realized that the Platonians cannot combine their power.  If they could Parmen is such a bad leader that a group of them would have probably overthrown him long ago.  

The three of them ask Alexander if the Platonians had always had this telekinetic ability.  Alexander states that they didn’t, they started to display it after being on Platonious for about six months.  Spock inquiries about their supplies, and Alexander lets him know that they had four months-worth.  This means the Platonians developed their abilities after two months of eating the planet’s food.  Armed with this information McCoy was able to isolate the compound kironide in the food of Platonious that gives them the power.  Parmen has the most in him that is what gives him the greatest power.  The reason why Alexander never received the power is because he lacks the growth hormone which also triggers the kironide.  Kirk has McCoy put so much kironide in them that they will be able to defeat any Platonian including Parmen.  McCoy can also fix it that Alexander can access the power as well, but Alexander chooses not to because he doesn’t want to become like those he hates.

Here are some gifts so you can't say we exploited you!

McCoy applies the kironide to the three of them but explains it may take hours or days to kick in.  While they are waiting Lt. Uhura and Nurse Chapel are beamed down.  They apparently are being controlled by the Platonians.  I guess Parmen and his friends have decided it is time for some more adult entertainment.  They have Spock and Kirk sing and serenade the women.  After that they physical embrace them and that is where we get the famous kiss.

Kirk being forced against his will!

Alexander decides he has seen enough and, before things start to get too physical between the Starfleet officers, he tries to stab Parmen.  Parmen sees this and forces Alexander to turn the knife on himself.  However, Alexander is saved at the last minute.  Kirk’s powers have turned on.  Kirk and Parmen battle over the direction of their knife with their powers and Kirk wins.  Alexander chooses to disappoint me and not kill Parmen.  I mean really disappointment me, I wanted to watch that POS die. Instead, Alexander chooses to lecture him about how he could have had his power but choose not to.  I will never understand Alexander. In defeat Parmen cowers like a kitten, he agrees with all of Kirk’s demands and the five Starfleet officers beam back to the Enterprise with Alexander.

Spock being forced to laugh!

Additional thoughts: Okay so let’s talk about the kiss.  Famed for being the first interracial kiss but that is false.  However, the fact that people thought it was for so long is a testament to the popularity of Star Trek and the Star Trek franchise.  So, I guess we can call it the “first interracial kiss that anyone remembered.”  Having the lead man of European descent kiss one of his supporting stars who was a woman of African descent was a big deal.  The problem however is in its execution. 

Kirk as a character has already established that he does not like to date his subordinates.  Having a romance with beautiful aliens that is one thing, but being romantic with someone that reports to you that is a different thing.  The only time Kirk ever seemed tempted to do that is in the episode Mirror Mirror when he met the prime universe, Marlena Moreau.  Also given Star Trek’s serialized format the writers would not want to get the Captain in any type of ongoing relationship that could develop.  So, anything that happens has to happen in a way it can be reset to zero.

Thus, we have this disaster Kirk and Uhura kiss because Parmen is having them put on a show. So basically, Kirk and Uhura (and Spock and Chapel as well) are being simultaneously sexually assaulted by Parmen. If had not been for Alexander we have no idea how far this was going either, but the Platonians seemed to be enjoying the show.

Kirk and Spock in their new outfits!

Frankly I think this could have been done much better if they decided to the famous kiss a year earlier.  In the episode Return to Tomorrow, instead having Diana Muldaur as Dr. Ann Mulhall a character we never see again, they could have had Uhura fill that part and have her carry the mind of Thalassa.  Their famous kiss could have been between two lovers of Sargon and Thalassa who had not had physical form in over 1,000 years.  Not only would have this been actually romantic but it also would solve the problem of needing the relationship to be over by the end of the episode.

I have a confession to make.  I have read The Republic by Plato and I found it to be very boring. I respect and appreciate what that work has contributed to Western Civilization but I often found it a chore to get through.  Now Kirk and Spock point out that this society is more like Plato in a fun house mirror but I would hate to be trapped with a bunch of people who wanted to talk about that book all the time first and foremost.  For a group of near immortals these are the dullest we have ever come across. When it was looking like Dr. McCoy was going to have to stay with them, I imagine he must have wished he was still on Yonada.  

The Enterprise crew in their new style!

Okay so I have issues with this time line that we are giving. They said the Platonians had traveled to classical Greece.  Yet if we crunch the numbers Philana gives us we find that they were born during the time that ancient Rome was transforming from the Republican government to the Imperial one.  Parmen himself was born on the very year Julius Caesar was assassinated.  Now granted the Greeks flourished under the Romans who also admired Greek culture but that wasn’t the impression that these characters had created.

Kirk trying to get control of Alexander from Parmen

Will someone please explain to dear Alexander that just because you have superpowers does not mean you have to be evil.  Alexander doesn’t want the power because he doesn’t to be like his enemies but in doing so, he hampers his own ability to resist their exploitation.  And resisting is something that he really wants to do, we see this when he tries to attack Parmen who is exploiting Kirk and Uhura.

 Speaking of Parmen, boy do I hate this guy. I can’t think of anyone else that Kirk and Spock encountered that was totally just a waste of space as this guy and at one point they fought Nazis.  Kahn was a former dictator who wanted to be a dictator again.  However, he was extremely charismatic and always interesting to watch.  The senior staff also pointed out he was quite a productive and benevolent ruler.  Charlie Evans did stuff that made me hate him but I could also sympathize with his character.  Trelane could be horrible but at least he was entertaining.  Parmen is evil, sadistic, and boring.  Kirk should have let Alexander kill him.

Alexander walking out with the Enterprise crew!

Since they had met these Greek inspired aliens why didn’t Kirk tell them that he already beat Apollo?  I realize that Plato wasn’t that big on the gods but I would have brought it up as Kirk.  What I also would like to know is how long did Kirk, Spock, and McCoy keep those powers?  Do they only work on the planet?  I bet they would be helpful at times.

This episode contains one of Captain Kirk’s best all time lines: “Where I come from, size, shape, or color does not matter. And no one has the power.”

FINAL GRADE 4 of 5